Wrapped in the wings of an angel

I asked my friend Courtney today after church what I am like, am I lighthearted or serious. She said I am serious. I guess she's right, I do not take life lightly.

I have long held to being who I really am when I meet someone new. When I go through life I do not put on a false front or hide who I am. I'm open, honest, and trusting until I am given a reason not to be. I am not judgmental, and I am very forgiving. I say what is on my mind, which might be a bit blunt and I can be overly honest but that is just me. I have a good sense of humor, but I do think life is too short to live it without any passion. I believe you have to try new things, and try to be open minded about new experiences. As such, I can be very enthusiastic about new experiences, new things and new friends. I am a kid at heart, and very empathic. I have a tender heart, and am not afraid to cry. Tears can be liberating, whether they are tears of joy or tears of sadness. My empathy can be a weakness at times, I care too much I guess. I just want to be accepted for who I am, and that is why I accept others for who they are.

Life has thrown me some curve balls some rough times... from before I was born (you'd have to know the story), to my early childhood, my junior and high school years, tough times in college, with my first job (being laid off for three months) out of college, to finding who I thought was the love of my life, and losing her to divorce last year, to the death of my grandmother. My grandmother was like my mother to me, I always felt her prayers carried extra weight with God. I miss her a lot.

Today in church, I was standing there while there was singing and music and I closed my eyes and was overcome with the feeling that an angel was standing behind me with their wings around me, draped over me. It was the closest I have ever felt to having a hug from God, and it was comforting and brought tears to my eyes.

Despite all of these things, and through everything God and Christ have walked with me, and been with me. I have had a lot of joy in my life, and hope I have brought joy to those I love, loved, and have cared for. I saw the Bucket List last night with a friend, and as I was driving home around midnight I was thinking through a lot of these things, going through a great deal of self contemplation.

I don't know why I need to say this, but I guess I need to put it out there and hope for the best. I know God has a plan for me, just as he has plans for everyone. I do not know the details of his plans, but I am open to them, and willing to grow where they take me. I just pray that my life will be full of love, laughter and happiness...